CSotD: Mostly Friday Funnies
Skip to comments
Arlo and Janis so often reflect my world view that it sometimes barely registers, but this one cracked me up, because I’ve noticed that ad writers have picked up on the term and insert it into commercials in order to assure us that their product is for cool people.
Which, as Arlo notes, assumes a fact not in evidence.
The stoic in me shudders equally at people who take pride in binge-watching anything and the people who take pride in not owning a television.
Though I suppose, to follow the master, I shouldn’t judge either of them.
Does anyone bathe in very little time? Don’t say that he does it ill, but in very little time. Does anyone drink a great quantity of wine? Don’t say that he does ill, but that he drinks a great quantity. For, unless you perfectly understand the principle from which anyone acts, how should you know if he acts ill?
Some people watch quite a lot of television, others watch none at all. I don’t understand the principle from which either of them acts.
Though I do know that you can get a lot of housework done during a Law & Order marathon, at least up to the point where you realize that, in every episode, the person with the most money is guilty.
Sam Waterson appears to know very well the principles from which they act.
While I’m waxing philosophic
Existential Comics generally requires at least a bit of familiarity with the great philosophers, but this one doesn’t. If you’ve been to the doctor, “Wittgenstein at the Doctor” is gonna make you laugh.
Juxtaposition of the Week
(Zits)
I refer to those leashes as “dog-casting reels,” because they seem to be used by people who want to stand around looking unaware that their pooch is 12 feet away, crapping in someone’s flowers.
The thing about them is that, as seen in both cartoons, they make control of the animal at the other end much more difficult, which is ironic or at least funny because people who are in control of their animal don’t generally use them, there being no reason for your dog to be that far away from you any place that requires a leash.
I would make an exception, however, if I owned a basenji. This is a photo of two African dogs playing, mine being the ridgeback, in pursuit of a basenji who was an awful lot of fun, except that each of his appearances at the park ended up with his owner leaving in pursuit of him.
We haven’t seen him at the park in a very long time. Basenjis cannot be trained, but owners can.
There are several breeds for which you are told not to ever let the dog off leash, but the basenji is in a class of his own and bless the basenji rescue people for being honest, because their testimony will certainly discourage impulse adoptions and I would caution you against trying to drink coffee and read the “bad” stories simultaneously.
Bottom Line: If I somehow ended up with a basenji, I would put it on a retractable leash.
Even in the house.
Now where were we?
Non Sequitur makes a suggestion that pings one of my eternal questions, which is why so many people want to get out of jury duty?
I finally got on a jury a couple of years ago, and it was a fascinating experience, beginning to end.
They didn’t give us drinks, but, oddly enough, on the third day, when they sent us off to consider our verdict, they provided a tray of sandwiches along with some chips and sodas.
I feel kinda bad about admitting this, because the poor schmuck on trial was clearly innocent and we could have had him out the door in five minutes, except that we waited to vote until after we’d eaten.
If there’d been an open bar, he might still be sitting there.
On the very unfunny side, what I really learned in that trial was how easy it is for an innocent person to end up in jail. This guy was the type to get himself in trouble, but more in a doofus way than a criminal sense. But, damn, they wanted his scalp!
Later — there was a 30-day rule before I could contact him after the trial — his ass-kicking public defender told me he sees horror story after horror story of innocent people being talked into taking pleas under the threat of being found guilty of something worse, simply because of public defenders who don’t make the effort.
But we don’t talk politics on Friday, so I won’t mention this.
Though, if we were talking politics, I’d point out that the Billy Ireland has received a trove of Ollie Harrington cartoons, and that sumbitch didn’t pull his punches.
I can’t wait for them to find an opportunity to put these up on exhibit.
Message to Newspaper Publishers
When I was about 19, Jones & Laughlin Steel was taken over in one of the first leveraged buyouts, and my father explained to me his anguish over how Ling-Tempco-Vought planned to gut the mine, closing it decades early in order to recoup their debt.
I was never so proud of anyone as I was when he quit and took another job rather than play the hangman for our little town.
Did it happen anyway? Sure.
But not by his hand.
Thirty-one years later, my publisher walked away from a newspaper chain his father had founded, after a Wall Street takeover saddled him with cuts he knew were immoral.
That’s called being a mensch.
Three terrific cartoonists were fired yesterday, and, sure, if their current publishers had refused to do it, the new publishers would have.
Nobody’s saying that it’s hard for the powers-that-be to find an asshole.
Point is, you don’t have to be one.
And if you think you can earn an ounce of loyalty from these heartless stock swappers, you’re also an idiot.
Comments 6
Comments are closed.